About my friend Kamille

So I am going to tell you all about my friend Kamille and why I love her. Kamille and I met in 2002 or 2003, it is really hard to say, but I am sure she will add a comment and tell me exactly when we met because she remembers EVERYTHING. Kamille and I worked together at Papa Kelseys, she was 16 and I was 21, so that would have made the year 2004 (SUCK ON THAT MS. PERFECT!!) Anyway, I came into the restaurant and saw her bending over looking into a refrigerator under the prep table and said something crude and now we are friends….no wait I think that was Jackie….I think Kamille caught me dancing to Mary Moore or Backstreet Boys….Anyway Kamille is the best.

I liked working with her because her car sucked and I liked to go outside and look at all the new Duct Tape she had applied to her car to keep it running. I also enjoyed breaking glass jars in the dumpster with her. We also had this closing routine that kicked butt, I am still convinced that if for one day we were to go back to P.K’s we could close faster than any of the current employees and would forget nothing.

Kamille and I went sledding on the snow drifts behind PK in garbage bags, I wrote her a $1 check for a dare she completed, but then told her not to try to cash it as it would bounce. Kamille and I had so much fun at P.K’s but I was old and she was a minor so we were “work friends.”

Kamille graduated from High School and moved to Jackson, it was lame, we were no longer friends. But one day I was sweeping my carport and she came over to say “hi” and we became friends….and then we weren’t because she went away again. One day I saw her car at P.K’s and laughed because we had both quit that damn job like 3 times, but always went back. I called our dear friend Jackie and we laughed at her, so I called her, it turns out she was also working at BB&B, she got me a job there, I forced her to move in with me, we went on a cruise, she moved to Jackson for the summer, she moved back to the house then she moved home and hopefully will return to the cave in my basement some day.  I miss Kamille. But don’t miss getting her mail because I still get it!!…metric butt-loads of junk mail from hippie colleges all over the country. FORWARD.YOUR .MAIL!

Here is a conversation between Jackie and Kamille.

Jackie: Hey Kamille what is one thing we have always thought about Jeff?
Kamille: Jeff is gay.
Jackie: Yes.

It still makes me laugh.

- In 2007 Kamille shaved her head bald.
- Kamille is a vegetarian, isn’t a vegetarian, is a vegetarian, isn’t….
- Kamille and I tried to fast for 10 days but on day one she ate a box of Charlston Chews
- Kamille’s dog weighs 102 lbs
- Kamille taught me to love HSM 1-2, I have yet to see 3
- Kamille hates cotton balls, talking about cotton balls, and describing how the little hairs on cotton balls  stick to your finger pads…she is gagging right now
- Kamille thinks she is tough, but is the most tender person I have met
- Kamille had a cat named Eboda and a dog named Squeakers
- Kamille and I used to have hair parties where we would spend hours doing our hair…the length of our hair? 2 maybe 3 inches.
- I once got in trouble at BB&B for bringing Kamille a glass of water….in a Waterford Crystal goblet.
- Kamille dresses up for my parties, but leaves before the party gets crazy!

Kamille is one of my bestest buddies and might need a little help from the Universe…so say a prayer, harness your chi, send good vibes or say a nice comment about her in the comment section…anything you can do to make her life a little brighter these days is appreciated.

SUCK IT!